Love is the engine of music. According to faroutmagazine.co.uk, the Beatles claimed it’s all you need, while Patti Smith described it as the security of being “in your hands.” But then there is love’s shadow: the “supervillain” of unrequited longing that keeps the lights burning at 3am.
If you are seeking a masterclass in this visceral ache, look no further than Fiona Apple’s “I Want You to Love Me”. Released on her 2020 magnum opus, Fetch the Bolt Cutters, the track is a raw exploration of a heart under the microscope.
Fetch the Bolt Cutters was a fearless record, recorded largely within Apple’s Venice Beach home. It breathes with organic chaos: wall-banging, dog barks, and makeshift percussion. Amidst this clatter, the opening track finds Apple standing as a woman who knows exactly where she’s been.
“I’ve waited many years / Every print I left upon the track has led me here.”
While she sings of trusting the “cosmic process,” the lyrics betray a desperate yearning: “And by that time, I hope that / You love me.”
Speaking to Vulture, Apple revealed the song’s shifting muse. “This started as a love song to somebody I hadn’t met yet,” she explained. It later pivoted to her then-partner, Jonathan Ames, before shifting again after their break-up. “The songs change who they’re about a lot,” she noted, highlighting the universal nature of the desire.
The track’s centrepiece is a philosophical duel between existential insignificance and human need. Inspired by a 2010 meditation retreat, Apple tackles the “tree falling in a forest” proverb. Her conclusion? The sound exists whether or not it is heard. “I exist whether or not you see me,” she asserts. “These things about me are true whether or not you acknowledge them.”
The song concludes with a startling vocal contortion, a wail that feels like a private exorcism. It serves as a haunting reminder: we may understand that nothing matters in the “long run,” but none of us are above the primal, human urge to be loved.
•Featured image: Fiona Apple/Far Out/YouTube still
